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there are many thins in life that i wish i have had, but i tend not to fouce on them even if they would benefit me. im the type of person who always will be there for others but when it comes to me no one is there. but dont get me wrong i dont look for it. I wish that i would be praised in my house instead of getting yeled at 24/7. do i do anything about it? no!i just learened to deal with. i wish that i had a  life.everyone around me is able to go out have fun with friends and have memorable experiences. me on the other hand has nothing.ever sice 1994 i have had trouble making friends. actually i had no true friends until middle school and that was only one person.back then the reason for not having friends was the fact that i was “different”. now in highschool well since im graduated i have even less friends. th reason for this is beause i dont conform to everyones i deas.like i said before i look out for others therefore i tend not to drink. but i get laughed at/ made fun of yelled at cause i dont drink/smoke or do anything else.Plus ingeneral im not a fan of alchol cause im afraid of what i may do because of it.I wish i would stop being screwwed over. no maater how many times i try to make peoples lives better and be the one to help i get nothing in the end. I dont ever  look to get anything or ask for anything if you get to know me pretty well i dont ask for anything. its just nice that if i did ever need something that someone would be able to return the favor. i wish that i could have a realationship. as i will laugh and say i have been single since 1992. but i hate it. i hate that fact that i can never had someone someone that was so close to that i could always go to them for something or have them be able to make my day better knowing that i was bad but i never told them. Its hard to get feeligns out of me but if you know me well enough you can see when im upset. they say things in highschool make you grow. but nothing did, i never went out, never got that first kiss or anything else. its like im the baby out of everyone. i would do anythign to be able to date someone. I know that i dont apeal to everyone else. Im not some crazy muscular guy with the jersey shore look or anything like what a girl wants. I only really have liked one person in my life to the point of wanting to have a realationship. But i have a -100% of it ever happening. its my best friend. shes been there for 7+ years. and from what i have seen we  click together very well i feel like i would be able to blow her previous boyfirends out of the water, the reason for this is because of the fact that she needs to be treated well and loved and cared which she hasnt been with all of them for the past 3yrs. i dont think it will happen not because i am being negative but because we are best friends and that  usually means realationships are out of the pictures. there is soo much i wish i could tell her but i feel that would make things worse. so i just have to deal with it like i do with everything else. like i said single and effective since age 0